Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Jamie Frevele Sells Her Legal Right to Marry on Ebay: In response to her home state of New York's rejection of marriage equality today, Jamie Frevele is selling her legal right to marry on ebay and donating all proceeds to the Point Foundation and other LGBT organizations.
Ebay item description by Frevele:
New York State has voted down marriage equality. A lot of people just don't believe all adults should be allowed to get married, usually for religious reasons, which is silly because you need to obtain a license from the state to get married, and there's a separation of church and state in this country, so denying someone the right to get married based on their sexual orientation is actually against the Constitution. The 14th Amendment, actually: Section. 1. All persons born or naturalized in the United States and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside. No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.
I'm an unmarried heterosexual woman, and since I probably won't be using my right to get married, I would like to give it away. I would like to sell it to the highest bidder and donate the proceeds to an organization that supports LGBT rights since the government designed to protect all of us is picking and choosing based on what they think is icky, weird, or unkown to them.
Bid now, and you can have my super wonderful privilege and legal ability to get married as many times as you want in a classy place like the one pictured. You don't have to know the person, you don't have to like them, you don't have to think through your decision to get married or anything - you can just do it! Because you can! Come on, it's cool to get married, and think of the pictures you'll have to show people of this person that they will definitely think is so wrong for you and probably is! But heavens to BETSY, do NOT marry someone of the same gender because that would be a mockery of the institution of marriage.
And if it doesn't work out, just get divorced. Half the cool people who get married do that anyway.
I will write you up a fancy, wonderful, articulate proclamation handing over my right to get married. I have no official documentation because this is something I was born with since I was born heterosexual. Unfortunately, this is only a symbolic gesture. However, since I'm picky and difficult, it's probably something that, if a physical object, would have been considered pristine and shiny after some dusting. Your bid, on the other hand, is real, and the donation you make to an organization that supports those who have been treated as second-class citizens will be well worth it.
I have not named an organization yet because I thought I would see if anyone wanted to join me on this journey rather than drag them into something they're not serious about, ready for, etc.
Happy Bidding!
Jamie Frevele
A Strange Encounter
After passing through an airport security operation completely run by one TSA officer, I sat down in the tiny waiting area of Manhattan Regional Airport and stared at my shoes as I tried to process all of the events of that weekend. As I mentioned in my last post, I attended the OUT & GREEK Conference at Kansas State two weekends ago. It was… fascinating, engaging, humbling, maybe even life-changing. I’m still not done staring at my shoes and processing it all though, so I’ll leave that for another post. Instead, I want to talk about an ephemeral and surreal encounter that made a perfect capstone for an already emotionally heavy weekend. Coming Out Story #3
[Ed. Note: Every Wednesday, we collect a coming out story and post it here, anonymously. They can be long or short, devastating or hilarious or boring or somewhere in between. The stories can be gathered in person or digitally - even using our "submit anonymously" link on the sidebar! If you'd like to send one in, email us at bluedevilsunited@gmail.com. If you don't feel like writing, we can meet in person, too, (ignore this PSA) and I'll transcribe your story here. Just let us know.]It was finals week in tenth grade, so we got to leave school right after our test. I went to my friend's house down the street with a bunch of people to hang out for the rest of the day. Everything was going great until my mother called the house I was at (this was before we all had cellphones) and just said "I'm coming to pick you up."
Oh?
From her tone of voice and withholding of any reason why I had to leave early, I suspected that someone had died. I have old grandparents, and thought the worst. But I was assured that everyone was "okay" and everything was "fine" (though we all know what that means). I hung up, and almost immediately realized what was up. I ran to my friend's computer and confirmed the worst: that I was not idle on Instant Messenger.
I had stayed logged into my Windows account on our family computer and furthermore had left up all of my AIM conversations. Including the one I had with [Shannon] the night before where, uh, I said some pretty explicit things about one of our straight friends, [John]. I basically outlined some pretty violent sex that I wanted to have with him and frequently used the words "fuck" and "brains out." This has happened to the best of us, right? ...Right?
So at this point I knew that my mother had read this (mortifying, in case you couldn't figure that out), and she was on her way to confront me over it. Awesome! This is exactly how I always saw my coming out unfolding.
She picked me up and we went back to my house in silence, and I was led to our computer room. We sat.
...
"I don't like the language you use on the internet. It's inappropriate."
Wait, really? Phew. I could handle a lecture on swearing. I'd done this a thousand times before, as I am a big fan of curse words. I simply sat there and absently agreed to never say these things again. Ever again. Can I go now?
"Are you gay?" she blurted.
Fuck. Shit.
There was really no way out (it's Puns Week on Our Lives) of this one, as the evidence was stacked up against me quite a bit. Straight guys do NOT say the things that I said. I had to come out. So many grandiose, articulate ways to do this! I could turn this into a real Lifetime movie. A Glee moment before there even was such a thing. Instead, because obviously I hate myself, I went with
"Duh!"
Yup. "Duh." That's the best I could do. That's what I came up with. Instead of Kurt from Glee I went with George from Seinfeld ("Jerkstore!"). I think I blacked out after that because I don't remember too many details (I was busy starting years of regretting my diction in that moment). I do know, though, that mom was more than accepting. Thrilled, actually. Probably because her years of having me lip-sync and dance Mariah Carey songs had paid off.
* * *
I guess looking back I don't entirely hate that that's how things went down. It forced me to come out, which had to happen at some point. It actually saved me years of perseverating and agonizing over how best to go about it. Mom knew then, but it took years until I was comfortable enough to talk about it. Which wasn't that bad. It was a pretty good arrangement where I knew she knew, and that she was The Best about it, but I was allowed to really come out on my own time.
But fuck, what an embarrassing, messy way to go about it.
"I don't think you should be sleeping over [John]'s house this weekend."
Will Gay Troops Get to Join the Debate About Their Own Service to America? Nathaniel Frank, author of "Unfriendly Fire", discusses the importance of the proposed bill that would allow gay service members to testify openly at Congressional hearings regarding "Don't Ask, Don't Tell".
"Congressman Alcee Hastings, Democrat of Florida, has just introduced a bill with 27 co-sponsors to allow gay service members to testify openly at Congressional hearings about "don't ask, don't tell." Rep. Hastings authored the bill to ensure that the national debate will not be stacked against those most affected by the current gay ban. Without explicit protection, gay troops could be fired for sharing their views and experiences with senators and representatives, since current law calls for discharging anyone who says they are gay. ..."
Rupert Everett's Advice To Gay Actors: Stay In The Closet: I can't decide whether this is just a really sad truth, or the kind of thinking that keeps us all from pushing for change, an acceptance of the status quo as stronger than our own will.
Personally, I prefer Meredith Baxter's newfound take on celebrities coming out.
...
"At 50, the 'My Best Friend's Wedding' star says that homophobia in Hollywood has kept him from becoming a leading man. He says that heterosexuals are cast as gays (pointing to 'Brokeback Mountain' and 'Transamerica') but gay men are denied the plum straight roles and often reduced to drag.
'The fact is that you could not be, and still cannot be, a 25-year-old homosexual trying to make it in the British film business or the American film business or even the Italian film business," he said. "It just doesn't work and you're going to hit a brick wall at some point. You're going to manage to make it roll for a certain amount of time, but at the first sign of failure they'll cut you right off. And I'm sick of saying, 'Yes, it's probably my own fault.' Because I've always tried to make it work and when it stops working somewhere, I try to make it work somewhere else. But the fact of the matter is, and I don't care who disagrees, it doesn't work if you're gay.'
Everett does admit that his openness about his sexuality has afforded him personal happiness if not professional success. He's glad he's not one of the "plenty" of gay Hollywood stars still stuck in the closet."
Amazing Speech on Marriage Equality: New York State Senator Diane Savino makes some very compelling statements on marriage equality.
PLEASE share this with friends, family, and everyone else who is important to you.
Washington's statewide vote for full domestic partnerships is official: "It's official! Governor Chris Gregoire and Secretary of State Sam Reed certified the election results on Tuesday. The new domestic partnership law will now go into effect at 12:01 a.m. Thursday, December 3. There are currently 13,082 people in registered domestic partnerships in both same-sex couples and opposite-sex couples where at least one partner is 62 or older. Washington state registered domestic partners are now fully equal to their married peers under Washington state law."
GA elects 1st black out lesbian state legislator, 1st Asian out gay man to Atlanta City Council: Wow! This is awesome! Today has been such a mix of good and bad news.
From GayPolitics:
Great news tonight from Georgia. Voters there have elected the first openly lesbian African-American state legislator in the United States, and Atlanta voters elected the first gay man and first Asian-American to the city council.
Simone Bell, a Victory Fund-endorsed candidate, won a runoff election to represent Georgia State House District 58. She becomes the second openly LGBT member of the Georgia State House, joining Rep. Karla Drenner. Both are from the Atlanta area.
...
Meanwhile Atlanta voters elected the city’s first gay man, and first Asian-American, to the city council. Alex Wan, a Victory Fund-endorsed candidate, will represent District 6 after winning his runoff election tonight. He currently works as the development director of Jerusalem House, Atlanta’s oldest and largest provider of permanent, supportive housing for homeless or low-income individuals and families living with HIV/AIDS.
Meredith Baxter Comes Out On the Today Show: Oh my god, Elyse Keaton is gay! This just adds fuel to sooo many childhood fantasies... And here I was thinking that Alex was supposed to be the lesbian.
Aside from my long-held torch for the perfect tv mom, the news here is this:
Meredith Baxter, who played Elyse Keaton on the popular 80s show "Family Ties" came out today as a lesbian. Baxter, who has been married three times and has four children, is currently in a relationship with general contractor Nancy Locke, and joins a growing group of women coming out later in life.
"I want to say that, I'm not a very political person. I've done political things before, but it's been brought to my attention that this is a political act, even though that's not what it feel like to me. It just feels like personal exposure, and it's uncomfortable. When my understanding is that so much research has been done that says that if anybody knows someone who is gay or lesbian, then when they are addressing gay or lesbian issues, political issues that affect their rights, they are less likely to vote against them, to take away their rights. So, if you knew me before, and you cared about me before, I'm the same woman. I'm the same mother to all these children, and if I can be that lesbian you know now, ok, well if I vote this way then that, that actually might affect this person I know, that Meredith."
Well said Ms. Baxter.
Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy
New York State Senate Votes Down Gay Marriage Bill: The State Senate defeated a bill on Wednesday that would legalize same-sex marriage, after an emotional debate that touched on civil rights, family and history. The vote means that the bill, pushed by Gov. David A. Paterson, is effectively dead for the year and dashes the optimism of gay rights advocates, who have suffered setbacks recently in several key states.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Proclamation By President Barack Obama on World AIDS Day 2009
The White House
Office of the Press Secretary
For Immediate Release November 25, 2009
Presidential Proclamation-- World AIDS Day
A PROCLAMATION:
Our Nation joins the world in celebrating the extraordinary advancements we have made in the battle against HIV and AIDS, and remembering those we have lost. Over the past three decades, brave men and women have fought devastating discrimination, stigma, doubt, and violence as they stood in the face of this deadly disease. Many of them would not be here today, but for the dedication of other persons living with HIV, their loved ones and families, community advocates, and members of the medical profession. On World AIDS Day, we rededicate ourselves to developing a national AIDS strategy that will establish the priorities necessary to combat this devastating epidemic at home, and to renewing our leadership role and commitments abroad.
Though we have been witness to incredible progress, our struggle against HIV/AIDS is far from over. With an infection occurring every nine-and-a-half minutes in America, there are more than one million individuals estimated to be living with the disease in our country. Of those currently infected, one in five does not know they have the condition, and the majority of new infections are spread by people who are unaware of their own status. HIV/AIDS does not discriminate as it infiltrates neighborhoods and communities. Americans of any gender, age, ethnicity, income, or sexual orientation can and are contracting the disease.
Globally, there are over 33 million people living with HIV. While millions have died from this disease, the death rate is slowly declining due, in part, to our Nation's global effort through the President's Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief (PEPFAR) program. However, HIV remains a leading cause of death worldwide. Women and children around the world are particularly vulnerable due to gender inequalities, gaps in access to services, and increases in sexual violence. While the statistics are distressing, new medications and scientific advancements give us reason for hope.
Tackling this disease will take an aggressive, steadfast approach. My Administration is developing a national HIV/AIDS strategy to bolster our response to the domestic epidemic, and a global health initiative that will build on PEPFAR's success. We will develop a strategy to reduce HIV incidence, improve access to care, and help eliminate HIV-related health disparities. We have already ensured that visitors to our shores living with HIV are not marginalized and discriminated against because of their HIV status. We have also secured the continuation of critical HIV/AIDS care and treatment services. Today, we recommit ourselves to building on the accomplishments of the past decades that have dramatically changed the domestic and global HIV/AIDS landscape.
NOW, THEREFORE, I, BARACK OBAMA, President of the United States of America, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Constitution and the laws of the United States, do hereby proclaim December 1, 2009, as World AIDS Day. I urge the Governors of the States and the territories subject to the jurisdiction of the United States, and the American people to join in appropriate activities to remember those who have lost their lives to AIDS, and to provide support and comfort to those living with this disease.
IN WITNESS WHEREOF, I have hereunto set my hand this twenty-fifth day of November, in the year of our Lord two thousand nine, and of the Independence of the United States of America the two hundred and thirty-fourth.
BARACK OBAMA
On Campus For World AIDS Day
Free screening of RENT
Griffith Theater, 8:00 pm
(Sponsored by Duke's Know Your Status, Freewater Presentations, Blue Devils United, Center for LGBT Life, and DELISH)
Free HIV Testing
Bryan Center, Meeting Room B
10:00am - 6:00pm
Sponsored by Know Your Status. Stop by, get tested, and receive a free t-shirt. It only takes 20 minutes!
Visit the Facebook event page here.
Mixed Blood
Screenings, tests, questionnaires, we’ve all been subject to the selecting process in some way, shape, or form; at times we find ourselves included on the right side of the metaphoric fence, and at others we are left out in the cold with the rest of the garbage. Rejection is never a positive experience (one would think), but we assume that we were not chosen because of our lacking merit, and in a justly manner, no less. For it must be true, obviously, that the standards and reasoning behind these selections were valid and without bias, right?
The world has never been short of its bigoted, excluding parties, and today is no different.
For most individuals who pop into Duke’s American Red Cross Blood Drive Donation Reception Area (sounds so much more official than just saying Von Canon, doesn’t it?), question 34 of the screening questionnaire is just another negligent hurdle to jump before you can claim your cookie and juice box. For others, however, including yours truly, it is a moral crossroads. Answer “no” and you walk free, most likely to the end, nonetheless affected save for that bruise on your arm from the volunteer continuously missing your vein (c’mon, seriously). But answer “yes”, and you find yourself forever banned, your name on a list of individuals deemed too risky to give.
The question in question (hehe, puns) is as follows: “From 1977 to the present, have you had sexual contact with another male, even once?” Now for me, the most insulting aspect of this question is not that it dares to equate my sexual activity unfit for the donor room, but the “even once” additive. As if we’re cheating members of Weight Watchers packing the Oreo filling between two cookies and calling it one serving. Oh, hell, it was just once, it won’t count, right? Quite frankly, those two small words insult the integrity and intelligence of the person in question (hehe, more puns) in what is already a discriminate and unfair topic to discuss.
Recently, The Advocate posted an article in their October issue concerning the battle of the lifelong ban of gay men by the FDA, detailing the origin of the ban, its supporters, its critics, and the measures taken. Basically, the ban came about amidst the HIV/AIDS scare and was taken as an extreme preventative measure that has, clearly, outstayed its welcome. Nowhere does the questionnaire screen heterosexual couples for their promiscuity, nor does it offer as severe a punishment for other “questionable” behaviors. In fact, many of the organizations that hold these blood drives (the American Red Cross included) are advocating that the FDA rethink its policy. As of yet, the administration is unyielding, yet Obama’s newest appointments promise at least a potential screening, giving the questionnaire a taste of its own medicine.
Again I cop out, Dear Reader, and leave the discussion up to you, but here are some facts to consider as you fill the comments box *cough cough*:
· Unprotected anal intercourse presents the highest risk due to the propensity for the rectal tissue to tear, permitting an access for infected blood and semen
· Other behavioral risk factors result in a 12-month deferral from donating versus the lifelong ban of MSM contact, a revision many are considering for #34—though I don’t see HOW they expect anyone to wait a year
· 15% of HIV infection is through anal intercourse, while 60% is through vaginal, according to the World Health Organization
So there you have it: now have at it!
Monday, November 30, 2009
Secretary of State Hillary Clinton calls the U.S. to "stand against efforts to marginalize and criminalize and penalize members of the LGBT community worldwide": Whether you love her or hate her (I've always adored her myself), you've got to appreciate Sec. Clinton standing up for us. Now I wonder if "worldwide" includes the U.S.?
WH defies court order -- top openly gay official's dept seeks to bar partner health benefits: From Pam's House Blend:
"This is yet another black eye for this administration that will force them to rationalize this maneuver. Mike Signorile:
If the Obama administration, which now has less than 30 days to respond, tries to fight this, not only will it undoubtedly cause another (and much bigger, in my opinion) firestorm within the LGBT community, but it's not clear that it actually can fight it, let alone win:Again -- the sorry truth is that is the Office of Personnel Management led by John Berry, an openly gay man, is pushing for this. His marching orders are to deny a fellow member of our community -- a federal employee -- rights ordered granted by a federal court. Unbelievable. "
[Judge Kozinski's] order last week demanded that the executive branch reverse course, and gave the Administration 30 days to enroll Golinski's wife as her health-insurance beneficiary. He made clear that if it doesn't, he's ready to use the powers of his court to enforce his decree. University of California law professor Rory Little, a former Justice Department prosecutor and chief of appeals, called the order a "bombshell." "This is like exposing the tip of a huge iceberg that nobody knew even existed," he told TIME. "It's a fascinating question: Do the courts even have the power to do this? Where does it leave things procedurally? Where can the Administration appeal? I think there are five or six lawyers in the [Solicitor General's] office scurrying around right now trying to figure out what to do with this."
Courage Campaign pulls out of 2010 Prop 8 repeal effort: The move to repeal Prop 8 has been up in the air for quite some time - a 2010 effort vs. 2012. Today the Courage Campaign announced that its review of the political landscape, organizing and funding does not yet support a 2010 initiative.
Identity Crisis: does the Movement require that we check a box?
I recently read an article written by Karla Jay, radical lesbian feminist and current professor of English and Gender Studies at Pace University, in which Jay tackles a subject countless of us have heard bandied about by former and current activists alike: Gen Y apathy.Jay makes some good points regarding not only the effects of our technologically driven lives on current activist apathy, but also the struggle to empower young leaders to make strides where their predecessors began 40 years ago (to be fair, I think there is a point to be made for the rise of young leaders during last year's presidential elections as well as the work of young leaders in the surging fight for Equality). But, one of the things that stood out to me in Jay's letter was her take on the refusal of some members of the LGBTQ community to identify as LGBTQ. Of the students she has observed, Jay says, "(t)here’s a Stonewall Coalition at the university, but you don’t need that because New York City has so many queer bars and you have the fake I.D. to get in. You’re oh-so-out, though most of you can’t apply the LGBTQ words to yourself in my queer courses." Her take on this movement away from identifying appears to be an accusation of sorts. Slipped within a diatribe on activist apathy, the feeling behind the sentiment is certainly fueled by an amount of distrust of the "label-less."
Jay's reaction to observing a certain reticence among queer students to identify as LGBTQ calls forward an issue that is key to the current Equality movement. Is this movement away from labels destructive to the unity and cohesiveness of the LGBTQ fight for equality? And is accepting a label on your sexuality really necessary for gaining access to your rights?
Murdered LGBTQ activist Harvey Milk epitomized the sentiments of the 1970s LGBTQ equality movement in his speech "That's What America Is!" when he urged LGBTQ Americans to come out to their families, their friends, their neighbors, and their coworkers. His work with other LGBTQ activist leaders under the slogan "Come out, come out, wherever you are!" resulted in the defeat of anti-gay legislation in California and a shifting tide in the fight for LGBTQ equality. Coming out and identifying as LGBTQ was seen as a political tool to win allies and to put a face to the people being affected by anti-LGBTQ sentiments and legislation. They capitalized upon the feminist political thought that "the personal is political" and used it to humanize the LGBTQ community.
For me, I believe that coming out and identifying remains a powerful weapon for LGBTQ equality. It is easy to demonize a faceless enemy that you have been warned against your entire life. It is much harder to hate someone you know, someone you truly love as a person, for being who they are, be it Black, Muslim, gay, or part of a host of other stereotyped and persecuted groups. Coming out is not only beneficial for the LGBTQ persons in question, but it forces the people around them to confront and become aware of their own reactions towards the LGBTQ community, homophobic or otherwise. However, when we don't come out, we allow the people around us to NOT have to confront these issues. We allow them to live in a space wherein they can believe whatever they want about the LGBTQ community without facing any challenge from us, while we avoid being open and secure about our own lives.
How does this tie in, then, to those who are out, but do not identify as LGBTQ? Personally, I can completely understand the desire to not identify or label oneself. Labels carry the burden of carefully cultivated stigma and stereotypes that probably do not apply to the individual, and it is frustrating to know that assumptions are made about you based on what "box" your sexuality most fits into. Not only do labels inherently limit sexual expression and identity, but they can become a means of parceling out our community along faction lines. In a Utopia, no one would need labels, because one's sexuality would not define one's ideals or morals in the eyes of peers. Sexuality would just be, and that would be that.
However, it is important to remember that we do not live in a Utopia. I respect anyone's decision to not allow themselves to be labeled. At the same time though, I believe there is room within this to still work to disseminate an understanding of our community to our peers and to forward LGBTQ equality. The practice Karla Jay described, that of participating in LGBTQ social life without having to represent the LGBTQ community within a broader social context IS, I believe, a loss to our community. At the very least, identifying with the LGBTQ community, even if not under one of its specific labels, is important in that, like coming out, it forces those around us to recognize us as part of a disenfranchised and underrepresented community. It makes each and every one of us social activists in our smaller communities by giving us a broader identity with which we can associate. In this way, even those of us who do not consider ourselves activists, become ambassadors for our queer community.
We are living and existing in a time of change, and I for one think that it is more than alright that we be a little confrontational.
Anonymous Posts(11.23.09–11.29.09)
Every week, we collect anonymous entries sent in using the link on our sidebar and post them all on Monday. We post anything as long as it doesn't contain personal attacks or hate speech. Feel free to submit your thoughts and questions :)Hey y'all. No anonymous posts came in this week! That is disheartening and frankly unacceptable, Readers. I expect everyone to step it up in the next week, our last before we break until next semester!
This post, though, was received over the summer when the blog was down:
#1:
I was watching the movie He's Just Not That Into You the other day, and there were a couple things that made me think about my love life and the dating scene of the gay (LGBTQ) community. The scene that tripped a sort of domino effect of reflection was one in which two gay men are explaining to a straight man the courting techniques that differ between gay and straight people. They basically demonstrated that gay people need only a glance before "it's over" -- the message is sent and the two people are either in bed, shredding each other to pieces or they've mutually decided against it. While I could understand the attempt at comedy, I couldn't help but feel insulted. Millions of people had seen this movie. Who knows how many of them internalized this lie as truth? The notion that gay people are some other species, with separate dating tactics and forms of communication, is the very one that has kept us from achieving equal rights and equal treatment. The movie was otherwise quite gay friendly, so it just didn't make sense that they should include this demeaning segment at all. If I'm so different from these heterosexual characters, why is it that I related so pathetically to their plight and heartache? Why is it that this woman's desperation to find someone, anyone to love her, struck me as so familiar? Why was this man's temptation so relatable?
Quite frankly, I'm sick and tired of having to explain myself as a human being. My attraction to another person is the same as my straight friends'! My own mother says she "doesn't understand." She has been supportive and accepting, but it saddens me to hear that she needs a breakdown of where my feelings come from and what they mean. "Just think of when you were dating at my age. Got it? Ok, there's your answer." Is the best our society has to offer a separated embrace? An alienated acceptance? What I don't understand is the need to classify us as a separate entity. In the U.S. especially, the tendency for segregation is a recurring one. This dangerous practice of drawing lines between religions, ethnicities, sexual orientations is what creates so much tension. Why can't we all be united under one label of "Americans," for example, each with his/her own idiosyncrasies and strengths? It is possible to retain one's culture and still be part of a different collective body.
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Lesbian mother wins custody case against 'ex-gay' former partner: From Pam's House Blend:
"A Rutland Family Court judge ordered a first-of-its kind parent custody change Friday in a child-visitation dispute involving a Virginia woman and her former lesbian partner who lives in Fair Haven.
In a 21-page order, Judge William Cohen granted sole custody of 7-year-old Isabella Miller to her nonbiological but court-recognized parent, Janet Jenkins.
Jenkins and her former partner — and Isabella's biological mother — Lisa Miller, who renounced homosexuality after the couple split in 2003, have been in and out of courtrooms in Vermont and Virginia for years arguing over visitation rights.
. . . After finding Miller in contempt of court earlier this year for denying Jenkins access to Isabella, Cohen said he decided the only way to ensure the child equal access to both parents was to switch custody."
Marriage equality - is it time to give up the referenda fight? Willy Hameline examines the effectiveness of fighting for marriage equality at the ballot.
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Happy Thanksgiving!
Hey y'all! We're taking a little break for Thanksgiving recess (though Aliza may still post news stories because she is The Best), but we'll see you on Monday!Enjoy your Thanksgiving weekend!
Stephen Fry Raaaails the Catholic Church: I. Love. This. Man. As a member of the Catholic Church, I completely agree with Mr. Fry. The Church's leaders need to get their heads out of their asses and their hands out of politics.
P.S. The rest of the debate is great if you care to see it. The ending is the real kicker though ;D
Charleston, SC City Council Passes Nondiscrimination Ordinance: The Charleston City Council passed legislation that prohibits discrimination in matters of public accommodations and housing to include protection for gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender (GLBT) Charlestonians.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Movie Review #2: Get Real
[Ed. Note: Every other Tuesday, Ari will be reviewing gay-themed movies. No, not those kind (ask him in person for those reviews). I swear by his judgment in films, and you should too :) ]During my coming out process in high school, I was guilty of popping in a movie from time to time in order to watch a film that showed how other gay teenagers worked through their angst, confusion, fear and all of those other crazy feelings that compounded themselves into a single thought. Get Real was definitely one of those films that were able to embody that dramatic confusion in a gay adolescent’s life that helped me understand that I wasn’t alone (I also happen to be a sucker for films that include a high school jock, can you say husband material?).The film, directed and written by Patrick Wilde, was an official selection at the 1999 Sundance Film Festival and plays off of the high school roles that tend to characterize and divide us while we play that petty game called the “high school experience”. The story revolves around a boyish teenager, Steven Carter (Ben Silverstone), who has known he was gay since he was 11 years old and continues to be harassed by the high school athletes for his more flamboyant attributes. Although Steven is comfortable with his sexuality, he isn’t sure that his parents and peers would be, and so the only person he tells is his best friend Linda (Charlotte Britain). One day after school, Steven has a run in with John Dixon (Brad Gorton) the high school all-star (isn’t it funny how it always works out that way? It’s never the ordinary jock, it’s always THE star athlete) and pursues a sexual tryst that turns into a relationship hidden from the public.Perhaps not all of us have herded sheep with our unexpected lover on the mountainside a la Brokeback Mountain (not to say that it isn’t a dream of mine), and Get Real understands the realistic and everyday hardships of being a closeted gay teenager in high school, whether that person is in the spotlight or cast aside as a mere outlier. The story, however, allows us to see how those who were once thought of as insignificant can rise above the social sphere to make a difference in the levels of acceptance we hope to gain from our parents, teachers, administration, etc. During a time when people are at the mercy of their parents’ will, it’s interesting to see how teenagers can become the voice of reason to the adults in their lives.Get Real is a terrific movie that relies on its humor to avoid victimizing the main character for pity, and instead celebrates the courage of one boy and his impact on an entire community. The best character by far is Linda; her quick wit and frumpy demeanor elicits the most hilarity and her role as a fruit fly (synonymous for another commonly used phrase in the gay community) is truly unparalleled by anyone else in gay cinema. This movie should be watched by anyone coping with the coming out process, or just hoping to look back on those perplexing years with a laugh or five. A-
Is the sexualization of women's basketball teams perpetuating the problem of homophobia in women's sports? Sports writer Jadya Evans responds to FSU's women's basketball team's new marketing ploy. Besides the obvious issues (girls can't just play basketball, they have to look pretty doing it too), Jadya asserts that this "feminizing" of women's basketball teams also represents the rampant homophobia in women's sports. By emphasizing gender norms and feminizing women basketball players, the viewer is meant to assume heterosexuality. If you know anything about women's sports and homophobia, you know this is hardly the first time that this has been an issue in the way that women's sports teams are marketed. What's even more frustrating is that these tactics aren't just harmful to the queer women they're trying to mask. They undermine all women, with the assumption that a woman can't just be amazing at what she does best, she must also be the "perfect" woman, glammed up, committed to community service, and blatantly heterosexual (being pregnant once in a while helps too). This isn't to say that any of these things are bad on their own, but when it becomes more important to emphasize these traits over the skill and sportsmanship of the women, especially in media focused on the sport, it's a problem.
Monday, November 23, 2009
Openly gay David Huebner is confirmed as US Ambassador to New Zealand and Samoa: "Openly gay attorney David Huebner was confirmed by the US Senate last Friday to serve as US Ambassador to New Zealand and Somoa."
Reports of anti-gay or religious-based hate crimes rise in US in 2008; more agencies tracking: Reports of hate crimes against gays and religious groups increased sharply in the U.S. in 2008, according to new FBI data released Monday.
Overall, the number of reported hate crimes increased about 2 percent. These same figures show a nearly 11 percent increase in hate crimes based on sexual orientation, and a nearly 9 percent increase in hate crimes based on religion.
Colbert on William Phillips:
| The Colbert Report | Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c | |||
| Tip/Wag - U.S. Speedskating Team, NY Lottery & William Phillips | ||||
| ||||
Don't Forget to Remember
In agreeing to post my news feed on the Blue Devils United blog, I have to admit I forgot how insanely depressing it can be. From the hideous murders of Jorge Steven López Mercado and Jason Mattison Jr. to the harassment of mayoral candidate Annise Parker, the messages that we have been receiving have been grim. And not only from within our own borders, as the attempt to make homosexuality punishable by death in Uganda reminded us. These attacks upon our community, nationally and globally, while shocking, aren't new. Until there the LGBT community is understood and accepted worldwide, there will always be more to report on, more information to disseminate. It can be overwhelming and frustrating and disheartening.However, I would like to give a platform, for a moment, to those other messages, the ones of hope and strength that come to us even as we learn of the crimes being committed against our community. A boy refusing to pledge to a flag that does not live up to all it promises. The British Prime Minister speaking out against transphobia. A local vigil. A march. A win. While these messages may seem a pittance in the face of the losses that we have felt, they are the embodiment of the love and fortitude of our community, and of our ever-growing legion of allies. I continue to take heart in the knowledge that progress, although slow, is inevitable, IF we continue to give our hearts and our minds to the struggle for it.
So as we pause and remember all of those lost before true equality could be won around the world, let us not lose faith in the power and potential of our LGBTA community.
And, because I just have to (and because it gives me chills every time), some words that never fail to give me hope:
Anonymous Posts(11.16.09–11.22.09)
Every week, we collect anonymous entries sent in using the link on our sidebar and post them all on Monday. We post anything as long as it doesn't contain personal attacks or hate speech. Feel free to submit your thoughts and questions :)#1:
Hello everyone! It's Class ACES Registration time again, I'm looking for a sexuality course that is fun and deals with LGBT issues. I'm thinking of signing up for SXL 135, with Janie Long, called "Clinical Issues in LGBTQ". Has anyone here taken this class? Is it worth taking, or fairly interesting? Is it hard or straightfoward?
Thanks! Looking forward to taking my first gay-themed class, if it's good!
-Undergrad lesbian
#2:
Gay marriage in New York! How awesome would this be? Go Gov. Patterson!!!!!
#3
The Colbert video reminded me of a speech Keith Olbermann made last November, speaking out against Prop 8. This video is incredibly meaningful and is just as relevant today as it was a year ago. Forgetting politics and putting religion in perspective, he stresses the importance of love and happiness and the significance of spreading that love and happiness in a world that is so filled with hate. This is a video that everyone should see: both people in support of the LGBT community and non-supporters alike. It can definitely spark discussions on religion, love, and the symbolic nature of marriage and what it truly stands for. I urge you to take a 7 minute break from whatever you are working on and listen to this speech.
Enjoy!
MA GOP Gubernatorial Candidate Charlie Baker Chooses Openly Gay Senator Richard Tisei as Running Mate: "Charlie Baker, a moderate Republican running to become the governor of Massachusetts, has chosen State Sen. Richard Tisei, who is openly gay, as his running mate. Baker issued the following on his Twitter account this morning: 'Want you to be the first to know: I’ve chosen State Senator Richard Tisei as my running mate. Excited about this team.' Tisei is the Senate Minority Leader, and played a key role in the fight to retain marriage equality in Massachusetts."
Tisei publicly discosed to the Boston Globe last week that he is gay: "Tisei was first elected to the House at age 22 and moved to the Senate in 1991. His sexual orientation has been an open secret on Beacon Hill, and he disclosed it publicly yesterday in an interview with the Globe, anticipating the scrutiny that would accompany a statewide candidacy. 'It is not exactly a news flash,' he said . 'I don’t think people really care these days.' "
Love, Survive, Organize: The Bull City Vigil for Jorge and Jason
“When my son told me he was gay, I told him, ‘Now, I love you more.’ I want to tell the world that hatred is not born with human beings, it is a seed that is planted by adults and is fostered creating a climate of intolerance and violence. We must change our ways and understand that anyone …could have been my son. And I want everybody to know that Jorge Steven was a very much loved son.”- Miriam Mercado
On Sunday night, members of the Durham/Duke community gathered downtown at Durham Central Park to honor the lives and reflect on the deaths of Jorge Steven López Mercado and Jason Mattison Jr. The vigil was just one of over 20 held across the country yesterday.
Jorge was 19 when he was killed November 14 in Puerto Rico for being gay. His body was found on the side of a road "partially burned, decapitated, and dismembered, both arms, both legs, and the torso" (from Pam's House Blend). By all accounts, Jorge was an incredibly loved boy who sought to put his mark on the world of fashion design.
This murder has revealed not only the unfathomably sick nature of an individual, but also a paradigm of ignorance and intolerance among those in positions of power. As a community, we were appalled to read that a police investigator (and bigoted idiot) for the case publicly remarked, "'people who lead this type of lifestyle need to be aware that this will happen." Furthermore, the investigation has shed light on Puerto Rico's lack of legislation in this area: "Never in the history of Puerto Rico has a murder been classified as a hate crime. Even though we have to follow federal mandates and laws, many of the laws in which are passed in the USA such as Obama’s new bill, do not always directly get practiced in Puerto Rico," explained Christopher Pagan, a Puerto Rican who first alerted American media of the story.
15-year-old Jason Mattison Jr. was also murdered this month in his hometown of Baltimore. Jason was found shoved into a closet "raped, gagged with a pillowcase [and] stabbed repeatedly in the head and throat" (from The Baltimore Sun). The boy aspired to be a pediatrician: "There was never a question of whether or not he was going to make it. Some children we have to pray over a lot -- pray for grades that they pass, but we never worried about that with Jason," said Principal Starletta Jackson. The suspect, Dante Parrish, 35, is a family friend who had recently been released from prison after serving 10 out of a 30 year sentence for his involvement in a 1999 killing. The research of a nonprofit legal group The Innocence Project led to the discovery of a technicality with Dante's proceedings that led to an overturning of his conviction (from Pam's House Blend).
The Durham vigil last night featured musical and spoken tributes to those who have been senselessly taken. Personally, this was one of the most powerful and inspiring events I've ever been a part of. While I rode a Kübler-Ross-ean emotional cycle of confusion, anger, and sympathy for two people I had never met, I was consistently able to find solace just in the faces - hell even in the mere presence of the friends and strangers surrounding me. Yes, this is incredibly cheesy and run-of-the-mill of me to say, I understand. But there is something to be said for a selfless gathering of people on a cold, cold, rainy Sunday night in the middle of Durham (read: in the middle of America) in order to express solidarity with each other, and with the community at large. Feeling unqualified as a writer (I'm an engineering student) to effectively convey the emotions and messages from the night, I'm compelled to embrace the cliché here. We've heard some quotes to the point of desensitization, but in this case the overwhelming level of relevance and retroactive empathy trumps, for me, the risk of being tiredly proverbial:
"Moreover, I am cognizant of the interrelatedness of all communities and states. I cannot sit idly by in Atlanta and not be concerned about what happens in Birmingham. Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly."-MLK
All pictures from the night are courtesy of our friend Justin Harris. Click on any image to enlarge.All Marriage Outlawed in Texas? Attorney Barbara Ann Radnofsky makes the argument that a 2005 Texas constitutional amendment aimed at banning gay marriage actually succeeded in banning all marriage.
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Draconian Anti-Gay Ugandan Law Protested In NYC, DC : activists denounce proposed measure mandating death penalty for "aggravated homosexuality: The new measure specifically criminalizes same-sex conduct –– ranging from sexual stimulation to “touching another person with the intention of committing the act of homosexuality” –– with a potential sentence of life imprisonment.
For those found guilty of “aggravated homosexuality” –– defined as sexual conduct by “serial offenders” as well as those who are HIV-positive –– the potential penalty is a death sentence.
In prohibiting the “promotion of homosexuality,” the bill would not only bar political activity on behalf of gay rights, but would also require anyone learning the identity of a sexually active gay person to report that information within 24 hours, or face a stiff fine or jail time.
TX: Houston mayoral candidate Annise Parker targeted by gay-baiting postcard mailing:
"I have nothing but compassion, respect and sensitivity towards those trapped in homosexual behavior. I have family members and friends who have been ensnared in this behavior, and I know something of the incredible pain and sorrow it has brought to them and their families. With God's grace, I carefully balance this love and respect for these individuals with warnings about the promotion and demand for legal and political approval for homosexual behavior that will stifle religious freedom and trap millions of more people in its deadly grip. Therefore, I would ask you to vote against Annise Parker for Mayor."Read more at Pam's House Blend...
NC: Openly gay State Sen. Julia Boseman will not run for re-election: "State Sen. Julia Boseman (D-New Hanover), the only openly gay or lesbian member of the General Assembly, announced Thursday she will not seek re-election when her term ends in 2010.
In a statement, Boseman cited family responsibilities for her decision to leave the General Assembly, according to Wilmington's WTKR News Channel 3. Boseman's domestic partner is expecting a child in January.
Elected in 2004, Boseman was the first openly gay or lesbian North Carolinian elected to the state legislature. Prior to her service in the Senate, Boseman served on the New Hanover County Board of Commissioners."
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